


Kisses like gunshots

by KetamineKendra



Category: Supernatural
Genre: First Time, M/M, Second Person, discovering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-27
Updated: 2013-11-27
Packaged: 2018-01-02 18:41:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1060214
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KetamineKendra/pseuds/KetamineKendra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean remembers. Short drabble.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Kisses like gunshots

**Author's Note:**

> First time with second person perspective. Came to me after having the phrase 'kisses like gunshots' stuck in my head for a few days.

You finally left your brother and his resident Angel behind in the bunker. You wanted to be sure that yours was okay and he is. He really is.

It feels like fire in your heart when you realize how badly you want him with you. 

You don’t know exactly when it happened, but somewhere between your third shot of vodka and your fifth shot of tequila there are lips on yours. And they aren’t the ones attached to the hot redhead at the end of the bar. You didn’t close your eyes, so the face in front of you is easy to see. Less easy to imagine how it got there until you realize it isn’t disgust that’s churning your guts. Those are shakes and butterflies and suddenly your missing him doesn’t seem so crazy. 

You give in, because what is there to do when your best friend is kissing you and you find your skin is electric? 

If you didn’t know better, you’d think he’d zapped you back, because suddenly there’s a grungy apartment around you and a bed that’s about equal to all the ones you spent the night in before the bunker. But you don’t care, really, because his hands are like forgiveness and his lips taste like that first sip of champagne you stole as a teenager. 

There’s a small part of your brain telling you how bad of an idea this is, but there’s enough liquor on your breath that it’s easy to cloud. 

_Are you going to go home? Are you gonna stay the night?_ His eyes are asking but you can’t seem to find an answer because your stomach is cramping. All those things that your dad put in your head. Never mind you have a woman that you consider your sister who likes girls just as much as you thought you did, before his hands had sent shockwaves through you. 

It takes a minute, but you finally just kiss him back because fuck him. Fuck your dad and all the shit he put on you that he never should have. Fuck his sanctimonious bullshit that always seemed ready to spew from his mouth. Fuck the part of you that speaks with his voice and is always ready to bring you down. 

Even months later you remember the way his hands were rolling across your body and how yours followed, slow, scared, but exhilarated. 

His lips from your mouth down to your collarbones to your chest. A kiss like a gunshot just under your heart. And you can see the blood in his mouth, but wait. This isn’t right. His lips had left a dark mark that had haunted your showers for weeks. Sam had asked why you smile so much. 

This time, though, his lips were red and there was a hole in you. 

It doesn’t make sense. 

What the hell happened?

And then you remember. 

A vampires nest. When did they stop attacking with their mouths? She’d picked up a gun. It was aimed at you, but you weren’t worried. Sam was just behind her. And then there was another behind him, his mouth driving toward your brother’s neck. You screamed. You weren’t afraid of what would happen without him to back you up. Just afraid of what those teeth could do to your baby brother. The one you carried out of a burning building, the one you sold your soul for. 

And she pulled the trigger.

And why were you thinking of Cas when you were dying? When blood was spilling out of your chest and Sammy was down beneath a vampire and you were probably never going to get in your baby again, why was it the kisses Cas had placed across your skin that played behind your eyes?

His voice must have been wrong. It didn’t exist. It couldn’t be here. Heaven was closed and he wasn’t an angel anymore. 

It wasn’t real. He wasn’t there as you bled out. He wasn’t there as Sammy somehow saved the day. 

You knew you wanted him there, though, and for the first time in your life you questioned what was really best for Sam. Zeke had brought back people from death but he claimed he couldn’t heal Sam? You knew you’d see about it, because your family had been broken for long enough and it needed to come back together again.

The first breath in your aching lungs feels like fire.


End file.
